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Archive for May, 2018

And how deep can the pit be that we need to crawl out of?

May 23rd, 2018 at 01:08 pm


We received notification at the beginning of the month that we owed an additional $3K to the high school. There was a new tuition manager this year, our scholarship package has always been a consistent amount (from the Diocese, the school, and various scholarships). Our son didn't receive one scholarship this year (for the $3K) but the assistance is always one line item. (I should add that we've had a student at this school for six consecutive years and there has never been a problem).

An account reconciliation showed we weren't on the list of CCW Scholars and the amount was reverse. So I had to borrow money from my father, who was totally fine with it. I always said that I would only ask for money for my kids. That happened.

So, I am eight days away from completing my graduate certificate in OD (and I'm doing well). I meet with the career counselor tomorrow. DH's last paycheck is 6/1. He has a promising opportunity with his old boss, but that company is in a reorg structure now. I've decided to look into temp agencies come 6/5.

I managed a small get together for my oldest daughter to celebrate her graduation from community college. I did a brunch and fed 15 people for about $60. That included a memory frame for $8. I also spent an additional $8 on flowers.

We've also depleted our flex spend money and all medical/rx is out of pocket. The latest rounds of DH's PET and CT scans adds another $1,600 to the balance of what we owe. Oh well, the Earth will continue to spin and the sun will continue to set and rise.

But we're healthy and reasonably happy and still have many blessings to be thankful for.

Changes.

May 15th, 2018 at 11:14 am


What a rough patch. Total breakdown of communication, depression, frustration, ready to throw the towel in. But won't.

Our situation has been stressed beyond belief - everyone is in transition, in flux, and not managing it well. Broken, but not destroyed. Losing the battle, but not the war.

The only good thing to the lowest point is there is only one way to go, and that is up.

The issues stem mostly from my husband making some broad-based assumptions about my willingness to amend our future plans by several years to accomodate a stable job offer and the reality that he is an only child with parents who need help and are unwilling to make things easy on him. There was the assumption that I would help out with my inlaws who are having a difficult time now with health (this is despite the fact that we are in dire need of additional income, I've spent several months killing myself for a certification so I can gain said employment, and my obligation is to my children not my inlaws - and I should add that they don't like me at all). I will be completing my school work and have applied for a part-time paid internship for the summer. Then I will going to Southern California with my daughter for several months; she is signed there and that agency wants her since she's been in the Midwest working here for the past year. I plan on being able to do contract work there as well. We have a place to stay and transportation issues to deal with, but it will work out.

This means getting ready to downsize as fast as possible. That will free up capital. We plan to sell the rental property and the primary residence and buy a townhome. It really just has to happen sooner than later. We simply cannot afford the mortgage and the taxes on both property. I'm far too tired anymore to play the juggling game with finances.

The good news: I am two weeks away from the end of the academic journey and am pretty certain on a 4.0 GPA for the 25% of the Masters Degree I completed in 20 weeks. Husband has a job interview for a stable positioin at a higher salary with his previous boss. Older daughter is graduating with her Associates Degree on Friday (inducted into the Honors Society, all while traveling and having a successful modeling career). Younger daughter is off to be a camp counselor at a YMCA summer camp for 10-weeks over the summer (she will be earning a very nice amount of money).

Notice there aren't any little money details here; I've sadly ignored the bigger issues by burying my head in the sand and sadly it came down to my breaking point: the unwillingness and inability to move forward on a future that is best for everyone.

So at this point no talk of a permaanent parting of ways. Happy about that. We've never taken that path at all in our conversing and fighting; and to do so was a big mistake.

Thanks for reading. Smile